jason vs the world


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2004-03-27 @ 12:06 p.m.
Spamsham

I am living in fear, stick with me here people, the world is no longer a safe place. I have just been through my email box and besides several chances to make my penis longer and to be able to keep my new long penis harder with herbal viagra there were several warnings about the state of the world.

Firstly a friend sent me a warning not to party with people I dont know in case I wake up in a bath tub full of ice with both my kidneys removed and a note telling me to call 911 (even though it apparently happened in Australia where the number is 000). I was wondering what that wierd pain was in my lower back. And who knew there was a kidney black market. 10 grand a piece and I have two already! excellent.

If that wasnt scary enugh another friend has a friend who has a friend and their sister caught a train the other day. Whilst she was on the train she notiecd an arab man drop his briefcase. She picked it up and ran after him after he got off the train even though it wasnt her stop. He thanked her profusely, opened the case which she noticed was full of money, he gave her five grand and said "I see you are a nice person, just a warning to you and your family not to be at the Melbourne Cup". Thank god the Melbourne cup was 5 months ago, when the email first started. Nothing happened in case you were wondering.

Now there is reason to worry about car jackers hiding behind the front seat of your car when you put petrol in and leave it unlocked. They then carjack you and kill you. Has happened all over Sydney apparently. Luckily there are too many people in Sydney already, what is worrying though is this murder spree hasnt been reported in any major papers. Why would they cover that stuff up. Bastards!!!

I am off now to talk to someone from Nigeria who has promised me millions of dollars if I pay a few of his legal fees. How jealous are you alln ow. Nigeria being the capital of the free world and all and this guy used to be a prince so I know he wouldnt lie.

Keep Smiling

Jason

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