When I first joined the bank I was a cocky young guy. Out drinking with my mates all the time and running amok as you only can in a small town. Reputation as a troublemaker was set and although it was hard work to maintain such a reputation I was certainly up for the workload.

The only thing I was never confident of was meeting girls. Girls scared the living hell out of me, still do to be honest. The trick to being a man about town though is to never let on that you are scared and for gods sake never ever show any signs of fear. It was this fear of girls which stopped me from ever asking out co-worker Stephanie. I had a crush for ages but it took me a long time to gather the courage to ask her out, still before I finish that little anecdote it is important I explain the rest of the lead up.

You see, as a man about town other men who had no town to be around would ask me for advice. One such boy was Russel who had just started working with the bank about two weeks after me. We thus ended up traveling to the big smoke together a lot for training and the like.

One day whilst traveling we got onto the matter of girls. Not being a man about town Russell wanted some tips on how to go about it. How do you ask a girl out and where should you take them for the first date. Not wanting to let the boy down I gave him a few hints. I was pretty sure being out of high school now that asking a girl out via her friends was no longer the way to go just as I was sure passing her a note before class no longer counted when you were an adult.

So the tips I gave him were, be honest and just ask her out somewhere. When quizzed as to where I told him to take her to the zoo, plenty to talk about and if you make a picnic you will be forever in her good graces. Great advice, even the weekend just gone Heidi and I went to the zoo, it rained heavily and we had cold pizza instead of a picnic but was romantic nevertheless.

I didn’t think any more of it and kept on with life as I knew it. Drinking after work at the local and having a grand time when my opportunity arose. Stephanie had turned up at the bar. Time to follow my own advice I thought. I strode over with all the confidence a man about town can muster and started chatting. I snuck the zoo into the conversation with all the subtlety I could muster. After telling me how much she loved the zoo I knew I was cruising, all too easy and stuff until “actually I went to the zoo last week, with Russell and it was the nicest day. Nice to meet a guy who doesn’t think of a day out as three beers and a counter meal”.

Shot down by my own game. At least I tried I guess. Next time Russell asked for advice I made a mental note to tell him that what girls really want is three beers and a counter meal. They love that stuff. Too bad I guess though that he never asked my advice again, he instead dated Stephanie for two years until she dumped him for a guy four years younger than her who drove a ute and he had a nervous breakdown. Too bad.

Keep Smiling

Jason

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