I dont know if I am normal or not. Judging by what one or two people had to say in response to my last blog post I would have to say it is possible I am a little on the other side of normal.

When I sit down to write a blog post I have no idea what I am going to say. I sort of let my mind run free and without fail the first two things to come into my head are "turnips" and "spermicidal jelly". I dont know why this is. I dont like turnips and have no idea what spermicidal jelly is or if it even exists.

I have similar issues with sounds and music. When I try and think of a song the only two things that enter my otherwise empty head is that circus tune they play while the clowns do their thing and the that weird da da dada dadada from the song Toms Diner by Suzanne Vega.

See I am not a complicated person. People sometimes think that I may be a bit deeper or have something hidden but nup. Turnips and weird sperm killing jelly to the tune of circus music and Toms Diner. On my death bed I am scared now of what my final words will be. Or worse, what if it is genetic and my kids are born with that insanely addictive clown song in their heads? What if this drives them to the circus lifestyle? My god, my unborn children could be carnies.

The next obvious concern is how did these things get stuck in my head. I have never really thought much about reincarnation before but how else would you explain these things. I believe now that in my past I was a turnip selling, contraceptive inventing travelling performer who write addictive pop songs that whilst at first seeming odd eventually seep into your head.

I know this seems a long shot but consider the possibilities if it is true. Could I be the next serious cult leader. Sort of a David Koresh but more into turnips and Suzanne Vega (featurning DNA). I know it doesnt seem like something you would want to sign on for but if the internet has taught us anything it is that no matter how weird you are, there are millions of people out there even stranger. It could take off.

I have tried to ween myself off the songs but it has never worked. I have tried other addictive music with catchy lyrics but once I stop singing them the clown song is back. I think I will work on the idea that putting all this craziness down in writing might finally help clear my head, if not scare the life out of anyone reading it.

Keep Smiling

Jason


Check me out!

<< last - next >>